Sebastian

I've started writing what I hope might be some kind of novel, one day, maybe. It steals from ideas that I've published before, but I guess it's kind of an extension on that short extract I published a while back, Cause and Effect. This will hopefully (and I say hopefully because it would be swell just being able to complete it as a project) be a story about Sebastian, a 27 year old waster who has essentially given up on life in knowing that nothing's worthwhile and how he finds a girl who changes this. There's not much to work with so far, I admit, but we'll see how this goes on and develops. Hopefully it will develop at any rate.

Regardless, here you go:

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In the great conga line of cause and effect, the only choice you will ever make is if you trudge along or dance.

Sebastian had trudged his way through the monotonous school system into his monotonous job in his own monotonous office. The walls, like his life, were bare; void of enjoyment and painted in soullessness. Every morning he would wake up on the same side of the bed he always did to the same ringing sound of the alarm, reminding him he was still alive, in lieu of barely remembering himself. Like Prufrock, he had measured out his life in coffee spoons and he sat himself at the edge of the table: close enough to hear the conversation but never so much as to engage in what they were saying, and far enough away for nobody to notice his empty look barrelling down to his hollow interior.

At 27 years old, he had spent his life getting by on the very least required. He lived his life on the edge of the minimum quartile and, having never pushed himself, stood motionless as the world moved ahead of him, as people got promoted above him and as the friends he once knew raced ahead, leaving him behind in that same spot he’d grown so accustomed to. People spend their lives looking for that feeling of ‘home’; for children it’s returning to their house after a long day at school to disappear into their own little world, for adults it’s that special person with whom they create that shared fantasy of sense of belonging, for Sebastian it was that lonely spot in between his bed and his work, that he knew would never leave him if he promised in return never to leave it.